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写作指导课

发布时间:2014-02-05 16:50:45  

Let’s learn to write better!

Husband(angrily): What a foolish woman! You’re one of the most foolish woman that I’ve ever seen!

Wife(calmly): Yes, you’re right. I’m so foolish that I married you! Husband:?????

A hard-working young man
A pianist
one of the most famous pianists in the world

Lang Lang

talented creative successful ……

Do you want to know more about Lang Lang?
started playing the piano when he was a little boy

became famous all over the world at the age of 20

Writing-昨天你的外国朋友Jim邀请你参加他的生日聚 会,但你婉言谢绝了,因为你已和同学约好去听 朗朗的钢琴音乐会。音乐会上,朗朗的演奏美妙 极了!他是位天才的钢琴家,从很小的时候就开 始学弹钢琴,差不多20岁就蜚声海内外了。你想 长大后成为像他那样的人。 请你根据以上的材料,给你的朋友Jim发一封email,讲述你的感受,并表达你的歉意。 注意不要在文中出现你的真实姓名。100词左右。

Before writing
1.What to write (明确写作内容) 2.Use proper tense(使用正确的时态) 3.How many parts(分成几部分) 4.The important part(确定重点部分)

Writing-昨天你的外国朋友Jim邀请你参加他的生日聚
会,但你婉言谢绝了,因为你已和同学约好去听 朗朗的钢琴音乐会。音乐会上,朗朗的演奏美妙 极了!他是位天才的钢琴家,从很小的时候就开 始学弹钢琴,差不多20岁就蜚声海内外了。你想 长大后成为像他那样的人。 请你根据以上的材料,给你的朋友Jim发一封e-

mail,讲述你的感受,并表达你的歉意。
注意不要在文中出现你的真实姓名。100词左右。

An outline(提纲)
Para 1.致歉—说明原因(音乐会)—现场情况及气氛 时态?

Para 2.朗朗事迹和自身感受 时态?

While writing
1.Use the familiar words and structures (使用熟悉的词句) 2.Use conjunctions (适当运用连接词) 3.Write neatly (书写整洁)

After writing
Check and correct the mistakes (检查并修改错误) ? 检查时态是否正确 ? 主谓语人称是否一致 ? 代词使用是否正确 ? 单词拼写是否正确 ? 词数是否符合要求 Remember: Please scratch if you get enough time.

打草稿

2008年温州市中考作文评分标准
? 满分档(15分):文本长度符合要求,书写规范, 涵盖所有要点,结构规范,条理清楚,逻辑严密, 词汇丰富,没有任何语法错误。 ? 第五档(12-14分):文本长度符合要求,书写规 范,涵盖所有要点,结构规范,条理清楚,逻辑 严密,词汇比较丰富,有少量语法错误。 ? 第四档(9-11分):文本长度符合要求,书写规 范,部分涵盖要点,行文基本连贯,词汇不够丰 富,有一些语法错误。 ? 第三档(6-8分):文本长度与要求有明显距离, 书写不规范,

要点不完整,行文不连贯,词汇量 不足,错误较多,勉强能看出作文意图。 ? 第二档(3-5分):能用句子表达,错误百出,只 能勉强猜测出作文意图。 ? 第一档(0-2分):有一些英语单词,但与话题毫 不相干,白卷零分。

? 1.Thanks for inviting. I’m sorry I can’t go to your party. 正: Thanks for inviting. I’m sorry I couldn’t go to your party. ? 2.He’s music make me relaxed and comfortable. 正:His music made me relaxed and comfortable. ? 3.He played the piano was very well. 正:He played the piano very well. ? 4.Lang Lang is play well. 正:Lang Lang played well.

? 5.Lang Lang starts playing the piano at the age of four . 正:Lang Lang started playing the piano at the age of four . ? 6.How wonderful Lang Lang played! 正:How wonderfully Lang Lang played! ? 7.Lang Lang is a talent musician. 正:Lang Lang is a talented pianist. ? 8.He was well-known about 20 years old. 正:He was well-known when he was about 20 years old.

? 9.When I grow up,I want to be a successful person like he. 正:When I grow up,I want to be a successful person like him. ? 10.I should learn from he. 正:I should learn from him.

The wonderful music made me feel so relaxed that I forgot all the problems around me.
As for me, I had great fun listening to the soft music. I still remember everything as if it happened just now. People all over the world know him well at the present. However, few people know how hardworking he is!

As you know, Lang Lang is my idol(偶像) . His music sounds so nice that I can’t help falling in love with it. His parents asked little Lang Lang to pratice playing the piano while other children were playing games.

The famous pianist Lang Lang held a concert yesterday, so I went to enjoy it with my classmates. He played well and the concert was really successful. To be honest, I can’t express my feelings with any words. I was deeply moved by his music.

He was never tired of practicing. Because of his talent, he became wellknown at the age of 20. I’d like to learn from him and be a wonderful person like him. It’s believed that I will have a bright future by working hard.

As you know, Lang Lang is famous as one of the most successful pianists around the world. So I couldn’t miss it! During the concert, I really enjoyed the music that is soft and gentle. You can imagine how great it was!
To be honest, I want to be a well-known pianist like Lang Lang, I will study harder to make my dream come true. I’m sure I can.

Why not make your writing better?
Come on! Do it now! You can begin it like this: Dear Jim, I’m very sorry that I couldn’t go to your birthday party yesterday.____________ ________________________________ ________________________________ Yours, Jane

Dear Jim, I’m very sorry that I couldn’t go to your birthday party yesterdsday. Some classmates had asked me to go to Lang Lang’s C

oncert before your invitation. As a super music fan, it’s impossible for me to miss such a good chance. At the concert, Lang Lang played several famous pieces. His music was so wonderful that I lost myself in it! Lang Lang is a talented pianist who began playing the piano when he was very young. Because of his talent and hard work, he became one of the most famous pianists around the world when he was about 20 years old. I hope I can be a hard-working and successful person like him in the future. Yours, Jane

Homework: 修改作文并誊写上交。 星沙英语 www.rr365.com


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